Day 35
I must be one lucky girl; I managed to leave my phone in the dolmuş this morning and realized it seconds after I got off. Panicking since the phone didn’t belong to me, and I am now only reached by my cell phone at work, I called my number from my boss’s phone and to my surprise the driver answered. He must be the nicest man ever because he had already called the last number dialed (my mom) and arranged the phone to be picked up. After several calls back and forth between the driver, my mom and I, the phone finally reached me within two hours.
The stars are finally lining up I think.
Day 33
I am no longer unemployed!
It has been just over a month since my move back to Turkey and I can’t believe that I already found a job. I’ve known about it for a week already but wanted to wait till my first day on the job was over to announce. Things are still falling into place, and as a Turk I believe in jinx, so I will not say much about it until I feel more settled. It is in the arts, the work language is English and I work with a very small team. Not much different than my job in SF, only this time I am on the gallery side of the art world instead of the artist side.
I knew that jobs in the art scene in this city were only heard by word of mouth, and the way I got this job was through a friend of my parents’ friend of a friend. Got it?
What does a 29 year old, a 31 year old and a 33 year old do when they get together on a Sunday evening? They see the Muppets!
Mahna Mahna to day 32!
Day 31 - end of the first month
As today marks the end of my first month, I thought I would answer the one question that I am constantly asked since my arrival; why did you move back to Turkey?
There is no one line answer. The decision came after several months of thinking, looking at my life and realizing what I needed to do for myself.
The thought of moving back to Turkey crossed my mind about a year ago. I had been living in the US for over 9 years and was still not a citizen; always accompanied by an expiration date on my passport, the stress and anxiety of not feeling settled were slowly increasing and there was nothing to look forward to that would relieve these feelings. I adored San Francisco and could see (and still do) myself settling there, I had a job many young artists would kill for, a supportive and loving family that never pressured me to move back to Istanbul and a very good quality of life full of good friends, good food and killer weather. Yet I couldn’t stop thinking about what it would be like if I lived in Istanbul, the wonder kept creeping into my head. I never felt quite right about being so far from family. Seeing them a few times a year didn’t work, I had also noticed that after moving to California I felt extremely far from Turkey. When my grandmother passed away 3 years ago, I was in my last semester of grad school. My brother called and I jumped on the first plane, flew for 14 hours, came home for two days for the funeral, then back on a plane and showed up in class the next day. That was such a hazy couple of days, as if it had never happened. I didn’t experience the grief and mourning like the other members of my family. Many other times, I felt that I was always the one who wasn’t there for this or that event.
Eventually I realized that I was feeling stuck in many aspects of my life; I just couldn’t see how the next 6 months or year were going to be different to make me happier. I needed to completely change something and I knew for me it was whether or not I would move to Turkey. If the idea had been simmering in my head for so long and this was the time where I could stop everything and start fresh in a new place, I needed to do it. This was the opportunity, a clean slate to restart. I wanted to give my home country a chance to show me what I could do here. I wanted to live with peace of mind, no expiration dates and where I could for once make long term decisions.
Last summer I came to see my newborn baby nephew when he was 7 weeks old. It was the first time I told a few of my friends that they could see me back here in 6 months; for good this time. It is now exactly 6 months later.
Day 30
My appetite has gone crazy in the last couple of weeks. I’m five times hungrier than usual and can’t figure out why.. I haven’t been able to move from the couch for the past hour, basically since dinner, I didn’t even eat much but it feels like a giant burrito has made its way into my stomach and is sitting like a brick. Slowly making my way to bed now and hoping for a lighter weekend.. good night from Istanbul.
Day 29 - My presence in SF continues
I may be a million miles away, but a part of me is still in San Francisco. My new solo show opened at the San Francisco International Airport and will be up for the next 3 months. I hope those of you who live in the Bay Area will get a chance to see and report back to me!
http://www.flysfo.com/web/page/sfo_museum/exhibitions/terminal2_exhibitions/D5
Day 27 - Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day is universal, and cheesy no matter what country you are in.
Abdi Ipekci Blvd is a long wide street which over the past couple of years became the ritziest, most expensive, pretentious street in the city. It is considered the prime shopping street in Istanbul but we are talking about stores like Louis Vuitton and Alexander McQueen, and last time I checked the average Turk didn’t shop at these stores. It is now a trend for the municipality to decorate the street with appropriate holiday theme, set up a big stage for live music and get the crowds excited. They are envisioning this street to be the new Champs-Élysées; we are about a thousand years away from that. Needless to say, fake blonds and socialites come to this neighborhood on the weekends by dozen fulls and are chased by paparazzi. I live 2 blocks away from this zoo.
Here are some snippets from Abdi Ipekci tonight; Happy Valentine’s day everyone.
The red carpet that nobody walks on.
Love tree.
Proposal in front of strangers, classy.
The love tunnel.
I thought these guys were in the US.
And finally Mr. Valentine himself.
